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fardell24Yeager 0.68 Beta, Morgendorffer 1.05 RC
“I'm going to make some bread, Daria,” Helen said as she pulled out a breadmaker and set it on the counter.
“Isn't that what supermarkets are for?” Daria asked, wondering just what her mother was up to.
“The Yeagers are coming for the weekend, and I can't serve them store-bought bread.
“Why not?” Daria asked.
“I haven't seen them for twenty five years, and let's just say they know a different Helen. A Helen famous for her oatmeal pumpkin seed loaf,” Helen explained.
“And just what have you done with this Helen?”
There was then the sound a car horn.
“They're here! I hope they don't think I've changed too much,” she said as she primped her hair.
“Just be yourself. That's what you've always told me.”
“I could kick myself for that,” Helen said.
Daria smirked.
Daria's sister, Quinn Morgendorffer saw a yellow Beetle pull up. 'Just like Jennifer's,' she thought. She then saw a couple in their late forties, dressed like they hadn't changed their styles since they were teenagers, get out of the car.
“Willow! Coyote!” Helen called out.
Willow went up to Helen. “Wow, Helen!”
Thus the Morgendorffer's and the Yeagers reintroduced themselves to each other. A German Shepherd came out of the car and sat next to Willow. “Why, even Leary is exactly the same.”
“Come here, boy! Don't you remember old Jake?”
Helen was confused. “Wait, that can't be Leary. He'd be almost thirty by now!” she said.
“This is Leary number three,” Willow explained.
“We had to replace the original a couple times,” Coyote said.
“If only you could do that with Timothy Leary, huh, man?” Jake asked with a laugh.
“They're working on it, man,” Coyote responded.
“Well, these two are irreplaceable,” Helen said. She moved aside. “Our girls, Quinn and Daria.”
Willow clasped Daria's hands. “You have a very old soul,” she said.
“It just looks mature for its age,” Daria responded.
“Are they retro, or are they just the same?” Quinn asked Daria after Willow had wandered off. She wasn't sure.
“I think it's the latter,” Daria answered.
“Let's get your bags, man!” Jake said.
“We travel light,” Coyote said.
Daria sighed. “In the head. I gotta get out of here before I catch any more good vibes,” she said, distaste showing in her voice.
Quinn objected to that. “Daria, you can't leave me alone with the hippies!” She was sure that she would get bored with their reminicing rather quickly.
“You can learn a bit more about Mom and Dad!”
Quinn changed her mind. “Deal!” she said. 'I'll invite Cindy, Kristen and Stacy over. And Maybe Kristen's Mom,' she thought.
“Ethan, come and meet the girls!” Coyote said.
A teen boy emerged from the Beetle. “Hi! I'm Quinn!”
Daria took the opportunity to make herself scarce.
Quinn didn't notice. She only had eyes for Ethan...
Fifteen minutes later, Daria arrived at her friend, Jane Lane's, house.
She found Jane and her other close friend, Jennifer Burns, in her brother, Trent's, room. They were talking to Trent and his friend Jesse Moreno. Jesse and Trent were comparing different methods of music storage.
“Zappa CD. Zappa Vinyl. Zappa Downloaded,” Trent said as he changed the sound inputs.
“All sound the same to me,” Jesse said.
“And you call yourself a musician?”
“No, I call myself an interpreter of sound,” Jesse responded.
“Top secret experiment?” Jane asked.
“My parents gave me their old records to sell at the flea market, but now Trent wants to keep them,” Jesse explained.
“It's the warmph of vinyl...”
“You're tuned to the radio,” Jane said as she turned off the radio.
“I was wondering why Zappa was selling fish sticks,” Trent mused.
“We have to be there by seven to set up,” Jesse complained.
“No problem, Daria and Jen are early birds,” Jane said.
“I get up early,” Jennifer spoke up.
“There is nothing like watching the sun rise, except watching the sun set in reverse,” Daria said. 'They haven't missed much!' she thought.
Trent and Jesse laughed. “Good one, Daria,” Trent said.
“Thanks,” Daria said.
“OK, this time, let's reverse the polarity of the plug. I'll stand facing west,” Trent said as he stood. up.
“Are you nuts?” Daria asked.
“Hey, you could always go on home and swap yogurt recipes with the Yeagers,” Jane said.
Daria grumbled.
“You should thank me. It's a chance for you to spend some quality time with Trent. The flea market is so romantic this time of year,” Jane teased. She turned to Trent and Jesse. “So, the flea market, we're there.”
“Cool,” Trent said.
Daria found the Lane's phone and called home. “Eric?” Helen asked.
“No, Mom. It's Daria.”
“Are you still at Jane's?”
“Yes. Jane says I can stay over tonight. Can I stay over?”
“I was hoping you would want to get to know our friends.”
“My old soul has already made their acquaintence ina previous lifetime.”
“Well that frees up some space for Ethan. He can take the guest room, and I can put Willow and Coyote in your room.”
“You're going to put them in my room? You better tether them to the bed so they don't float away.”
Helen laughed.
Daria went over to where Jane and Jennifer were watching the TV.
“A nightmare story of an enchanted kiss gone horribly wrong when Sick Sad World returns.”
“Okay, I can stay. You have anything for me to sleep in?”
Jane went over and got an old dressing gown.
“Not that!” Daria said.
Jennifer spoke up. “I go to my place get some spares.”
“That would be a good idea,” Daria said with a glare at Jane.
Back at the Morgendorffer, Quinn showed Ethan Daria's room. “This is where Daria sleeps and composes her music,” she said.
Ethan looked at the room. “Cool! What kind of music?”
“Metal. She says it suits her mood.”
“It probably does,” Ethan mused. “Tell Mom and Dad that I'm sleeping here.”
“You're not sleeping now?” Quinn asked.
“It has been a long trip,” Ethan explained. He then went in and closed the door.
“I guess I'm gaming tonight afterall,” Quinn mused.
Saturday, April 1, 2006
Trent knocked at Jane's bedroom door, and opened it.
“Come back at six,” Jane said sleepily.
“It is six,” Jesse pointed out.
“Then how come you're so damn chipper?” Jane asked with annoyance.
“It was easier to stay up all night than to wake up early,” Trent answered.
“We'll load the van,” Jesse added.
“Van?” Jane asked.
“You know, the Tank,”
“Oh, goody,” Jane said.
Back at the Morgendorffers, Quinn met Ethan at breakfast. “Hi, Ethan,” she said, with a meaningful lilt to her voice.
“Hi, Quinn,” Ethan said, not taking the bait.
“Want to have a look around Lawndale?” Quinn asked.
“You mean Lawndale's malls?” Ethan asked. “Pass.”
“Wait! There's that Big Strawberry. We could go see that,” Quinn suggested.
“That actually sounds interesting,” Ethan considered.
“So, you'll come?” Quinn asked.
Ethan sighed. “Sure.”
Daria, Jane, Jennifer, Jesse and Trent had arrived at the flea market. They had unloaded the Tank, and then started sorting through the LPs. Although the latter two had fallen asleep.
“Should I fille this under 'self indulgent posers' or 'underrated geniuses'?” Daria asked.
“I'm not sure,” Jennifer said. “You could just file them alphabetically,” she suggested.
“But that would be boring,” Daria complained. “I guess they call it a flea market because it makes you want to flee.”
“Oh, relax. We're going to do well today,” Jane said. “We have a choice location,” she added sarcastically. She indicated the booth next door, where a man was selling 'patriotic' toilet seat covers which were adorned with the faces of various presidents (including the current one).
Then an obese lady approached the booth. “I'm looking for snow domes. You got any, girls?” she asked. Daria seemed to remember her from somewhere.
Daria said. “Sorry, Ma'am. All we have are these strange, flat disks the aliens left behind. You know about the aliens, don't you?”
Jennifer sighed.
“You enjoy working with the public, don't you,” Jane said.
Daria grumbled.
Quinn knocked on Daria's bedroom door. Ethan opened it. “Are you ready?” Quinn asked.
“Of course,” Ethan said. He could see that Quinn had changed into slightler flashier clothes, although they still displayed her partiality for a certain cyberpunk movie.
“Let's go then,” Quinn said. Ethan then followed her downstairs.
Willow saw her son and Quinn come down the stairs. “Hi, Ethan, you're up early,” she said as she completed a Yoga move.
“Quinn is showing me around Lawndale,” Ethan said.
“Not to the malls, I hope?” Willow asked.
“No, the Big Strawberry, whatever that is,” Ethan said.
“That sounds like a 'tourist trap' place. Be careful.”
“I will, Mom.”
Willow then started meditating, for the third time that morning.
Quinn and Ethan said goodbye to Helen before heading out.
Back at the flea market, an annoyance arrived at the stand in the form of Charles Ruttheimer III, known amongst the students of Lawndale High as 'Upchuck'.
“Hello Ladies! I didn't know you were of an entrepreneur bent. Perhaps you would be so kind as to show me you goods?”
“Upchuck, what are you doing here?” Jane asked with annoyance.
“I am on a quest for the Holy Grail of fast food premiums. A complete 1993 California raisins posable eraser set. Only mint condition will do,” Upchuck explained. He nooded at Trent and Jesse. “Your investors?”
“Silent Partners,” Jane answered.
Upchuck nodded. But before he could say any retort, another man appraoched the booth.
“Do you by any chance have a copy of Neighborhood Threat?” he asked.
“No, but we do have Non-Threatening Neighborhood,” Daria answered. The guy thought for a moment and left.
“I wonder if I may provide you gals with a lesson in salesmanship. It's a once in a lifetime offer,” Upchuck said.
“No!” Jennifer objected.
“How about once in two lifetimes,” Daria countered.
“Now, now, let the boy show us how to do it. Then we won't have to,” Jane said.
“Are you sure?” Jennifer asked in a whisper.
“Yes,” Jane answered, waving Jennifer's concern aside,
Meanwhile. Quinn and Ethan, met Quinn's friend Cindy Brolsma outside the grounds of the Big Strawberry. “Hi, Quinn,” Cindy said.
“Hi, Cindy,” Quinn said.
“And this is Ethan?” Cindy asked, with an appraising eye.
“Yes,” Quinn answered.
“He's cute,” Cindy responded.
“Cindy!” Quinn called out playfully.
“Well, he is,” Cindy said, equally playfully.
Ethan held back a sigh. “Are we going up?” he asked.
“Yes,” Quinn answered.
They entered the grounds of the Big Strawberry. “How much is it to go to the top?” Quinn asked Cindy.
“Not sure, it was five dollars each a few years ago,” Cindy said after some thought.
“Exorbitant,” Ethan commented.
“Probably,” Cindy said.
“You see, ladies, trying to close a sale without proper technique is like playing cards without a full deck. You must treat your customers like a king. This is the ace up your sleeves. You're a joker if you don't, and you'll be left with jack,” Upchuck explained.
“Is that really the best analogy?” Jennifer wondered.
“I think so, Ms. Burns,” Upchuck answered.
Seeing that Daria and Jane were not interested (and were in fact ignoring Upchuck), Jennifer stepped closer and asked; “Tell me more.”
Cindy, Ethan and Quinn looked out over Lawndale from the top of the Big Strawberry. “Wow,” Ethan said. He hadn't expected the town to look pretty. 'I suppose it is the trees,' he thought. Many of the streets and yards had well established trees growing.
“That's nothing compared to the Fall,” Cindy said.
Ethan looked back to the vista in front of them. He supposed it would look a lot prettier when the leaves had changed colors. He turned to Quinn. She was standing quite close to him. He moved over so that she wasn't in his personal space. “Is there something you want to say, Quinn?” he asked.
“Huh?” she asked.
“Quinn, you're tongue-tied.”
“Oh, yeah,” Quinn realized.
“Quinn,” Ethan said. “You're nice and all, but we only met yesterday,” he added, trying to let her down gently.
“Oh!” Quinn said in disappointment.
“However,” he said. He saw Quinn perk up again. “We can be friends.”
“Sure,” Quinn said with less disappointment.
“Are there other places we can look at in Lawndale?” Ethan asked.
“None quite so high,” Cindy answered.
“But there are other places?”
“Yes,” Cindy answered.
Meanwhile, back at the flea market, business had been slow for Upchuck and Jennifer. “Ah, Mr. DeMartino,” Jennifer pointed out.
Upchuck saw the history teacher approach them. “Mr. DeMartino!”
“Well, Charles Ruttheimer, and Jennifer Burns. What is it, Charles?” He could see that Jennifer wouldn't speak.
“As a man of culture and breeding, I thought you might be interested in some of our audio gems.”
“Is this a pathetic attempt at flattery, Mr. Ruttheimer? An obvious smoke screen for your calculated attempt to separate me from the payments I receive each week for babysitting a bunch of determined idiots?”
“Eep!” Jennifer said. She ducked down behind the counter.
“I just wanted to sell you some records...” Upchuck said in a frightened voice.
“You have anything by Annette Funicello?” DeMartino asked.
“Certainly,” Upchuck said, he began to look through the records.
A while later, Upchuck was making a roaring sale. Or so he thought. “Is this the best you can do?” a customer asked.
“Afraid so,” Upchuck responded.
“Well, then I'm just going to walk away,” the customer said. He turned. “I'm walking!” He walked away, but then returned. “Okay, fifty five cents,” he said, handing that amount over to Upchuck and taking an LP.”
By this time, Trent had woken up. “Thanks man,” he said. He held out his hand. Upchuck gave him the money.
“What about my commission?” he asked.
“Hey, you're working for free,” Trent said.
Upchuck sighed.
“Well, Trent, now that you've returned to the land of the living, maybe you and Daria can go get us some soda. With caffeine?” Jane suggested.
“No problem,” Trent said. “Coming?”
“Sure,” Daria said with a blush.
“Take your time,” Jane said.
After Daria and Trent had walked off, Jesse said “I could use a burger!”
“I'll go with you,” Jane said. She turned. “Jen, could you watch the booth with Upchuck?”
Jennifer looked at Upchuck, uncertainly, “Sure,” she said.
“I can handle it!” Upchuck added.
Jane and Jesse then left.
Upchuck then saw a man walking past the booth, reading a magazine. “Excuse me! Is that a vintage copy of Eyefull?”
“1969,” the man answered.
“Where did you find such a treasure?”
“That booth over there,” the man pointed out.
Upchuck then left the booth to find more copies of the magazine, leaving Jennifer to tend it, alone. “Great!” she murmured. The man then looked at the booth. “May I help you?” Jennifer finally asked.
“What LPs do you have?” he asked.
“A great many,” Jennifer answered.
“Could you show me?” he asked.
“Of course,” Jennifer said quietly. She started showing the man the various LPs.
“I'd like all of those,” he said.
“Sure,” Jennifer said. She began showing the man the various LPs. Unfortunately, she suddenly realized that she needed to go to the bathroom... 'Oh no!'
After going to two other places in Lawndale, Cindy, Ethan and Quinn arrived back at the Morgendorffer house. They could see that something had happened.
Jake and Coyote were lounging on the hood of the beetle. “What's up, Dad?” Ethan asked. “Looks like the berry juice has fermented again,” he said aside to Cindy and Quinn.
“Reminicing,” Coyote said, not entirely convincingly.
“Come on, I bought some slush cups,” Ethan said.
“Wouldn't they have melted?” Cindy asked.
“Probably,” Ethan said.
“We can eat them out back,” Quinn said.
“That will work.”
Jane and Jesse were walking back to the booth, sodas in hand. “You see, my theory is that our primitive hunting instinct has no outlet in modern society,” Jane said.
“Cool,” Jesse said. He slurped his soda.
“So, rather than stalking animals, we substitute it with the shopping experience, and hunt for objects,” Jane added.
“Cool,” Jesse said again.
Jane was exhasperated. “And then, Jesse, while we're asleep, those objects come to life and plot their secret take over of civilization. April 1st, 2014. That's the day they make their move!”
“Cool!”
“But they could make it sooner!” Jane said, trying to get Jesse to react.
“I don't know, all these people swapping useless junk. Maybe the Yeagers are onto something. At least they are not caught up in constant state of consumer frenzy,” Daria said.
“Yeah , I guess if you're gonna insist on holding onto something from the early Seventies, peace and love beats a Mission Impossible lunchbox,” Trent said.
“Especially if the lunch is still in it,” Daria added.
“Well, let's go give Jesse and Jane a break,” Trent suggested.
They then ran into those two. “Too late,” Daria said.
“Who's watching the booth?” Trent asked.
“Jen and Upchuck,” Jane said.
“I don't think the latter is...” Daria said. She pointed to where the wannabe Casanova and their history teacher were rummaging through boxes of magazines.
“You have redeemed yourself, Charles. Woof!” DeMartino was saying.
“Um... Where's Jennifer?” Daria asked when she saw the ransacked booth.
The girl in question appeared. “Sorry! I had to go to the bathroom!” She said.
“Figures!” Daria said, annoyed at the circumstance.
“You're forgiven,” Jane said. She turned to Upchuck, and grabbed him by the ear. “You should have seen when Jen left the booth!”
“Um, less to carry home?” Upchuck said in a hopeful tone.
“Daria?” Jane asked.
“It's not worth it,” Daria said after a moment of thought.
As they drove away from the flea market in the Tank, Jesse said. 'Well, we do have three copies left of 'Boston'.”
“At least we're not money grabbing capitalist pigs, right, Daria?” Trent asked.
“Yeah, we're hard core believers in voluntary simplicity,” Daria said.
Jennifer looked at Jane in confusion.
“Don't look at me!” Jane said.
Cindy, Ethan and Quinn had gone to the Pizza place. “No, they never formally charged them, but they did keep them there in jail for the next day,” Ethan said.
“Wow!” Quinn said, as she put the information in her PDA. “This has gotta be worth at least twenty five bucks. Now, tell me again about how Mom punched out the cop?”
Cindy sighed.
It was late when Daria, Quinn and Ethan arrived back at the Morgendorffers. “Girls, I expected you for dinner!” Helen admonished. “Before I officially ground you, would you care to account for your whereabouts?”
“Sure,” Daria said. She took out a notepad. “But first, a few questions. “Number one: Why did you and Dad spend a night in jail in Boulder in August, 1976?”
Helen gasped. Then Daria asked another question...
Sunday, April 2, 2006
The Yeagers were ready to leave.
“Ethan?” Quinn asked, once their fathers had said goodbye.
“Yeah?”
“You never told me whether you thought I was, you know, cute?”
“Oh, well, sure you're cute.”
“Thanks.”
“And you're knowledgeable about stuff,” Ethan added, uncertainly.
“Yes...” Quinn prompted.
“But you're too invested in your identity as a 'geek'.”
“What? What do you mean?” Quinn asked, confused.
“There's more to life than being interested in video games, anime, computers or minutiae of science fiction,” Ethan said.
“Of course, there is,” Quinn said. “I'm not shallow!”
“I'm not saying you are,” Ethan responded. “You just need to have your priorities straight.”
“Right...” Quinn said. She had something to think about.
Soon, the Yeagers had left. “Daria, do you think long-distance relationships are a good idea?” Quinn asked.
“Why are you asking me?” Daria asked.
“Something Ethan said...”
Daria was about to add something to that when Jake interrupted. “You know, kids, it's pointless to try to go back in time. You have to live in the present, and I'm going to start right now. First things first: I'm getting rid of all my vinyl records. Hey, Daria! You want 'em? ”
“I'm going to make some bread, Daria,” Helen said as she pulled out a breadmaker and set it on the counter.
“Isn't that what supermarkets are for?” Daria asked, wondering just what her mother was up to.
“The Yeagers are coming for the weekend, and I can't serve them store-bought bread.
“Why not?” Daria asked.
“I haven't seen them for twenty five years, and let's just say they know a different Helen. A Helen famous for her oatmeal pumpkin seed loaf,” Helen explained.
“And just what have you done with this Helen?”
There was then the sound a car horn.
“They're here! I hope they don't think I've changed too much,” she said as she primped her hair.
“Just be yourself. That's what you've always told me.”
“I could kick myself for that,” Helen said.
Daria smirked.
Daria's sister, Quinn Morgendorffer saw a yellow Beetle pull up. 'Just like Jennifer's,' she thought. She then saw a couple in their late forties, dressed like they hadn't changed their styles since they were teenagers, get out of the car.
“Willow! Coyote!” Helen called out.
Willow went up to Helen. “Wow, Helen!”
Thus the Morgendorffer's and the Yeagers reintroduced themselves to each other. A German Shepherd came out of the car and sat next to Willow. “Why, even Leary is exactly the same.”
“Come here, boy! Don't you remember old Jake?”
Helen was confused. “Wait, that can't be Leary. He'd be almost thirty by now!” she said.
“This is Leary number three,” Willow explained.
“We had to replace the original a couple times,” Coyote said.
“If only you could do that with Timothy Leary, huh, man?” Jake asked with a laugh.
“They're working on it, man,” Coyote responded.
“Well, these two are irreplaceable,” Helen said. She moved aside. “Our girls, Quinn and Daria.”
Willow clasped Daria's hands. “You have a very old soul,” she said.
“It just looks mature for its age,” Daria responded.
“Are they retro, or are they just the same?” Quinn asked Daria after Willow had wandered off. She wasn't sure.
“I think it's the latter,” Daria answered.
“Let's get your bags, man!” Jake said.
“We travel light,” Coyote said.
Daria sighed. “In the head. I gotta get out of here before I catch any more good vibes,” she said, distaste showing in her voice.
Quinn objected to that. “Daria, you can't leave me alone with the hippies!” She was sure that she would get bored with their reminicing rather quickly.
“You can learn a bit more about Mom and Dad!”
Quinn changed her mind. “Deal!” she said. 'I'll invite Cindy, Kristen and Stacy over. And Maybe Kristen's Mom,' she thought.
“Ethan, come and meet the girls!” Coyote said.
A teen boy emerged from the Beetle. “Hi! I'm Quinn!”
Daria took the opportunity to make herself scarce.
Quinn didn't notice. She only had eyes for Ethan...
Fifteen minutes later, Daria arrived at her friend, Jane Lane's, house.
She found Jane and her other close friend, Jennifer Burns, in her brother, Trent's, room. They were talking to Trent and his friend Jesse Moreno. Jesse and Trent were comparing different methods of music storage.
“Zappa CD. Zappa Vinyl. Zappa Downloaded,” Trent said as he changed the sound inputs.
“All sound the same to me,” Jesse said.
“And you call yourself a musician?”
“No, I call myself an interpreter of sound,” Jesse responded.
“Top secret experiment?” Jane asked.
“My parents gave me their old records to sell at the flea market, but now Trent wants to keep them,” Jesse explained.
“It's the warmph of vinyl...”
“You're tuned to the radio,” Jane said as she turned off the radio.
“I was wondering why Zappa was selling fish sticks,” Trent mused.
“We have to be there by seven to set up,” Jesse complained.
“No problem, Daria and Jen are early birds,” Jane said.
“I get up early,” Jennifer spoke up.
“There is nothing like watching the sun rise, except watching the sun set in reverse,” Daria said. 'They haven't missed much!' she thought.
Trent and Jesse laughed. “Good one, Daria,” Trent said.
“Thanks,” Daria said.
“OK, this time, let's reverse the polarity of the plug. I'll stand facing west,” Trent said as he stood. up.
“Are you nuts?” Daria asked.
“Hey, you could always go on home and swap yogurt recipes with the Yeagers,” Jane said.
Daria grumbled.
“You should thank me. It's a chance for you to spend some quality time with Trent. The flea market is so romantic this time of year,” Jane teased. She turned to Trent and Jesse. “So, the flea market, we're there.”
“Cool,” Trent said.
Daria found the Lane's phone and called home. “Eric?” Helen asked.
“No, Mom. It's Daria.”
“Are you still at Jane's?”
“Yes. Jane says I can stay over tonight. Can I stay over?”
“I was hoping you would want to get to know our friends.”
“My old soul has already made their acquaintence ina previous lifetime.”
“Well that frees up some space for Ethan. He can take the guest room, and I can put Willow and Coyote in your room.”
“You're going to put them in my room? You better tether them to the bed so they don't float away.”
Helen laughed.
Daria went over to where Jane and Jennifer were watching the TV.
“A nightmare story of an enchanted kiss gone horribly wrong when Sick Sad World returns.”
“Okay, I can stay. You have anything for me to sleep in?”
Jane went over and got an old dressing gown.
“Not that!” Daria said.
Jennifer spoke up. “I go to my place get some spares.”
“That would be a good idea,” Daria said with a glare at Jane.
Back at the Morgendorffer, Quinn showed Ethan Daria's room. “This is where Daria sleeps and composes her music,” she said.
Ethan looked at the room. “Cool! What kind of music?”
“Metal. She says it suits her mood.”
“It probably does,” Ethan mused. “Tell Mom and Dad that I'm sleeping here.”
“You're not sleeping now?” Quinn asked.
“It has been a long trip,” Ethan explained. He then went in and closed the door.
“I guess I'm gaming tonight afterall,” Quinn mused.
Saturday, April 1, 2006
Trent knocked at Jane's bedroom door, and opened it.
“Come back at six,” Jane said sleepily.
“It is six,” Jesse pointed out.
“Then how come you're so damn chipper?” Jane asked with annoyance.
“It was easier to stay up all night than to wake up early,” Trent answered.
“We'll load the van,” Jesse added.
“Van?” Jane asked.
“You know, the Tank,”
“Oh, goody,” Jane said.
Back at the Morgendorffers, Quinn met Ethan at breakfast. “Hi, Ethan,” she said, with a meaningful lilt to her voice.
“Hi, Quinn,” Ethan said, not taking the bait.
“Want to have a look around Lawndale?” Quinn asked.
“You mean Lawndale's malls?” Ethan asked. “Pass.”
“Wait! There's that Big Strawberry. We could go see that,” Quinn suggested.
“That actually sounds interesting,” Ethan considered.
“So, you'll come?” Quinn asked.
Ethan sighed. “Sure.”
Daria, Jane, Jennifer, Jesse and Trent had arrived at the flea market. They had unloaded the Tank, and then started sorting through the LPs. Although the latter two had fallen asleep.
“Should I fille this under 'self indulgent posers' or 'underrated geniuses'?” Daria asked.
“I'm not sure,” Jennifer said. “You could just file them alphabetically,” she suggested.
“But that would be boring,” Daria complained. “I guess they call it a flea market because it makes you want to flee.”
“Oh, relax. We're going to do well today,” Jane said. “We have a choice location,” she added sarcastically. She indicated the booth next door, where a man was selling 'patriotic' toilet seat covers which were adorned with the faces of various presidents (including the current one).
Then an obese lady approached the booth. “I'm looking for snow domes. You got any, girls?” she asked. Daria seemed to remember her from somewhere.
Daria said. “Sorry, Ma'am. All we have are these strange, flat disks the aliens left behind. You know about the aliens, don't you?”
Jennifer sighed.
“You enjoy working with the public, don't you,” Jane said.
Daria grumbled.
Quinn knocked on Daria's bedroom door. Ethan opened it. “Are you ready?” Quinn asked.
“Of course,” Ethan said. He could see that Quinn had changed into slightler flashier clothes, although they still displayed her partiality for a certain cyberpunk movie.
“Let's go then,” Quinn said. Ethan then followed her downstairs.
Willow saw her son and Quinn come down the stairs. “Hi, Ethan, you're up early,” she said as she completed a Yoga move.
“Quinn is showing me around Lawndale,” Ethan said.
“Not to the malls, I hope?” Willow asked.
“No, the Big Strawberry, whatever that is,” Ethan said.
“That sounds like a 'tourist trap' place. Be careful.”
“I will, Mom.”
Willow then started meditating, for the third time that morning.
Quinn and Ethan said goodbye to Helen before heading out.
Back at the flea market, an annoyance arrived at the stand in the form of Charles Ruttheimer III, known amongst the students of Lawndale High as 'Upchuck'.
“Hello Ladies! I didn't know you were of an entrepreneur bent. Perhaps you would be so kind as to show me you goods?”
“Upchuck, what are you doing here?” Jane asked with annoyance.
“I am on a quest for the Holy Grail of fast food premiums. A complete 1993 California raisins posable eraser set. Only mint condition will do,” Upchuck explained. He nooded at Trent and Jesse. “Your investors?”
“Silent Partners,” Jane answered.
Upchuck nodded. But before he could say any retort, another man appraoched the booth.
“Do you by any chance have a copy of Neighborhood Threat?” he asked.
“No, but we do have Non-Threatening Neighborhood,” Daria answered. The guy thought for a moment and left.
“I wonder if I may provide you gals with a lesson in salesmanship. It's a once in a lifetime offer,” Upchuck said.
“No!” Jennifer objected.
“How about once in two lifetimes,” Daria countered.
“Now, now, let the boy show us how to do it. Then we won't have to,” Jane said.
“Are you sure?” Jennifer asked in a whisper.
“Yes,” Jane answered, waving Jennifer's concern aside,
Meanwhile. Quinn and Ethan, met Quinn's friend Cindy Brolsma outside the grounds of the Big Strawberry. “Hi, Quinn,” Cindy said.
“Hi, Cindy,” Quinn said.
“And this is Ethan?” Cindy asked, with an appraising eye.
“Yes,” Quinn answered.
“He's cute,” Cindy responded.
“Cindy!” Quinn called out playfully.
“Well, he is,” Cindy said, equally playfully.
Ethan held back a sigh. “Are we going up?” he asked.
“Yes,” Quinn answered.
They entered the grounds of the Big Strawberry. “How much is it to go to the top?” Quinn asked Cindy.
“Not sure, it was five dollars each a few years ago,” Cindy said after some thought.
“Exorbitant,” Ethan commented.
“Probably,” Cindy said.
“You see, ladies, trying to close a sale without proper technique is like playing cards without a full deck. You must treat your customers like a king. This is the ace up your sleeves. You're a joker if you don't, and you'll be left with jack,” Upchuck explained.
“Is that really the best analogy?” Jennifer wondered.
“I think so, Ms. Burns,” Upchuck answered.
Seeing that Daria and Jane were not interested (and were in fact ignoring Upchuck), Jennifer stepped closer and asked; “Tell me more.”
Cindy, Ethan and Quinn looked out over Lawndale from the top of the Big Strawberry. “Wow,” Ethan said. He hadn't expected the town to look pretty. 'I suppose it is the trees,' he thought. Many of the streets and yards had well established trees growing.
“That's nothing compared to the Fall,” Cindy said.
Ethan looked back to the vista in front of them. He supposed it would look a lot prettier when the leaves had changed colors. He turned to Quinn. She was standing quite close to him. He moved over so that she wasn't in his personal space. “Is there something you want to say, Quinn?” he asked.
“Huh?” she asked.
“Quinn, you're tongue-tied.”
“Oh, yeah,” Quinn realized.
“Quinn,” Ethan said. “You're nice and all, but we only met yesterday,” he added, trying to let her down gently.
“Oh!” Quinn said in disappointment.
“However,” he said. He saw Quinn perk up again. “We can be friends.”
“Sure,” Quinn said with less disappointment.
“Are there other places we can look at in Lawndale?” Ethan asked.
“None quite so high,” Cindy answered.
“But there are other places?”
“Yes,” Cindy answered.
Meanwhile, back at the flea market, business had been slow for Upchuck and Jennifer. “Ah, Mr. DeMartino,” Jennifer pointed out.
Upchuck saw the history teacher approach them. “Mr. DeMartino!”
“Well, Charles Ruttheimer, and Jennifer Burns. What is it, Charles?” He could see that Jennifer wouldn't speak.
“As a man of culture and breeding, I thought you might be interested in some of our audio gems.”
“Is this a pathetic attempt at flattery, Mr. Ruttheimer? An obvious smoke screen for your calculated attempt to separate me from the payments I receive each week for babysitting a bunch of determined idiots?”
“Eep!” Jennifer said. She ducked down behind the counter.
“I just wanted to sell you some records...” Upchuck said in a frightened voice.
“You have anything by Annette Funicello?” DeMartino asked.
“Certainly,” Upchuck said, he began to look through the records.
A while later, Upchuck was making a roaring sale. Or so he thought. “Is this the best you can do?” a customer asked.
“Afraid so,” Upchuck responded.
“Well, then I'm just going to walk away,” the customer said. He turned. “I'm walking!” He walked away, but then returned. “Okay, fifty five cents,” he said, handing that amount over to Upchuck and taking an LP.”
By this time, Trent had woken up. “Thanks man,” he said. He held out his hand. Upchuck gave him the money.
“What about my commission?” he asked.
“Hey, you're working for free,” Trent said.
Upchuck sighed.
“Well, Trent, now that you've returned to the land of the living, maybe you and Daria can go get us some soda. With caffeine?” Jane suggested.
“No problem,” Trent said. “Coming?”
“Sure,” Daria said with a blush.
“Take your time,” Jane said.
After Daria and Trent had walked off, Jesse said “I could use a burger!”
“I'll go with you,” Jane said. She turned. “Jen, could you watch the booth with Upchuck?”
Jennifer looked at Upchuck, uncertainly, “Sure,” she said.
“I can handle it!” Upchuck added.
Jane and Jesse then left.
Upchuck then saw a man walking past the booth, reading a magazine. “Excuse me! Is that a vintage copy of Eyefull?”
“1969,” the man answered.
“Where did you find such a treasure?”
“That booth over there,” the man pointed out.
Upchuck then left the booth to find more copies of the magazine, leaving Jennifer to tend it, alone. “Great!” she murmured. The man then looked at the booth. “May I help you?” Jennifer finally asked.
“What LPs do you have?” he asked.
“A great many,” Jennifer answered.
“Could you show me?” he asked.
“Of course,” Jennifer said quietly. She started showing the man the various LPs.
“I'd like all of those,” he said.
“Sure,” Jennifer said. She began showing the man the various LPs. Unfortunately, she suddenly realized that she needed to go to the bathroom... 'Oh no!'
After going to two other places in Lawndale, Cindy, Ethan and Quinn arrived back at the Morgendorffer house. They could see that something had happened.
Jake and Coyote were lounging on the hood of the beetle. “What's up, Dad?” Ethan asked. “Looks like the berry juice has fermented again,” he said aside to Cindy and Quinn.
“Reminicing,” Coyote said, not entirely convincingly.
“Come on, I bought some slush cups,” Ethan said.
“Wouldn't they have melted?” Cindy asked.
“Probably,” Ethan said.
“We can eat them out back,” Quinn said.
“That will work.”
Jane and Jesse were walking back to the booth, sodas in hand. “You see, my theory is that our primitive hunting instinct has no outlet in modern society,” Jane said.
“Cool,” Jesse said. He slurped his soda.
“So, rather than stalking animals, we substitute it with the shopping experience, and hunt for objects,” Jane added.
“Cool,” Jesse said again.
Jane was exhasperated. “And then, Jesse, while we're asleep, those objects come to life and plot their secret take over of civilization. April 1st, 2014. That's the day they make their move!”
“Cool!”
“But they could make it sooner!” Jane said, trying to get Jesse to react.
“I don't know, all these people swapping useless junk. Maybe the Yeagers are onto something. At least they are not caught up in constant state of consumer frenzy,” Daria said.
“Yeah , I guess if you're gonna insist on holding onto something from the early Seventies, peace and love beats a Mission Impossible lunchbox,” Trent said.
“Especially if the lunch is still in it,” Daria added.
“Well, let's go give Jesse and Jane a break,” Trent suggested.
They then ran into those two. “Too late,” Daria said.
“Who's watching the booth?” Trent asked.
“Jen and Upchuck,” Jane said.
“I don't think the latter is...” Daria said. She pointed to where the wannabe Casanova and their history teacher were rummaging through boxes of magazines.
“You have redeemed yourself, Charles. Woof!” DeMartino was saying.
“Um... Where's Jennifer?” Daria asked when she saw the ransacked booth.
The girl in question appeared. “Sorry! I had to go to the bathroom!” She said.
“Figures!” Daria said, annoyed at the circumstance.
“You're forgiven,” Jane said. She turned to Upchuck, and grabbed him by the ear. “You should have seen when Jen left the booth!”
“Um, less to carry home?” Upchuck said in a hopeful tone.
“Daria?” Jane asked.
“It's not worth it,” Daria said after a moment of thought.
As they drove away from the flea market in the Tank, Jesse said. 'Well, we do have three copies left of 'Boston'.”
“At least we're not money grabbing capitalist pigs, right, Daria?” Trent asked.
“Yeah, we're hard core believers in voluntary simplicity,” Daria said.
Jennifer looked at Jane in confusion.
“Don't look at me!” Jane said.
Cindy, Ethan and Quinn had gone to the Pizza place. “No, they never formally charged them, but they did keep them there in jail for the next day,” Ethan said.
“Wow!” Quinn said, as she put the information in her PDA. “This has gotta be worth at least twenty five bucks. Now, tell me again about how Mom punched out the cop?”
Cindy sighed.
It was late when Daria, Quinn and Ethan arrived back at the Morgendorffers. “Girls, I expected you for dinner!” Helen admonished. “Before I officially ground you, would you care to account for your whereabouts?”
“Sure,” Daria said. She took out a notepad. “But first, a few questions. “Number one: Why did you and Dad spend a night in jail in Boulder in August, 1976?”
Helen gasped. Then Daria asked another question...
Sunday, April 2, 2006
The Yeagers were ready to leave.
“Ethan?” Quinn asked, once their fathers had said goodbye.
“Yeah?”
“You never told me whether you thought I was, you know, cute?”
“Oh, well, sure you're cute.”
“Thanks.”
“And you're knowledgeable about stuff,” Ethan added, uncertainly.
“Yes...” Quinn prompted.
“But you're too invested in your identity as a 'geek'.”
“What? What do you mean?” Quinn asked, confused.
“There's more to life than being interested in video games, anime, computers or minutiae of science fiction,” Ethan said.
“Of course, there is,” Quinn said. “I'm not shallow!”
“I'm not saying you are,” Ethan responded. “You just need to have your priorities straight.”
“Right...” Quinn said. She had something to think about.
Soon, the Yeagers had left. “Daria, do you think long-distance relationships are a good idea?” Quinn asked.
“Why are you asking me?” Daria asked.
“Something Ethan said...”
Daria was about to add something to that when Jake interrupted. “You know, kids, it's pointless to try to go back in time. You have to live in the present, and I'm going to start right now. First things first: I'm getting rid of all my vinyl records. Hey, Daria! You want 'em? ”
